Endless Shame

Memories
That's all they are
The screams recorded
Over and over
They won't stop
A darkness crowds over
Followed by the endless echo
The shame covers my mind
Never ending
I can't find a place to hide
I'd ask for help
But where do I go?
Does it even matter anymore?
Did it ever?
No
If it had then it would've ended
Right?

Exist

Anything
Tell me anything
You know I exist
You took everything
What else do you want?
My existance?
You told me lie after lie
You told me you cared
Why must this hurt?
I don't understand anymore
This world
The next
Do they really exist?
Or is it something I made up?
Made up to keep my nightmares
I don't understand anymore
Drowning, drifting, dying
I don't know how to survive
Why does it hurt?
I don't want this pain!
Help me!
Help me exist...

Tell Me One Thing

Nothing's ever enough
Why must my life confuse everything?
Why can't I have anything
Anything at all?
Why must you tell me such a lie?
If I ever knew anything
Why was it that lie?
Don't tell me the same thing again
I learn from my mistakes
Now if you will
Leave me the fuck alone!
I wanna, at least, die in peace!
Now that I've said that
Tell me one thing..

Fake Lives

Were all the people in the world meant to hate everything
So anything you wanna talk about?
Well I dont know anything more than what I've been told
Help me out here..
I dont care..
Dont you?
No, no no one's meant for that..
You dont care..
You're just like everyone else, trying to be different, but the same
You just watch me fall..
From afar dont you see anything?

Help Me

I've lost it!
Everything!
Help me find
It was lost inside
Can't you help?
No, I should've never asked
I've looked for the answers before
Why did I even think when I thought you had them?
I don't know
But I'm loosing myself more and more
This is just ticking
Me and all around me
Why?
Why can't I let go of every sin I've made?
I just can't
But maybe you can help me
No!
Why do I keep thinking that?!
Why can't I except the fact that I'm never gonna be found?
I've been getting more and more lost since this begun
Why can't I say that and know it?
I need help
No!
I don't need help!
Not from you!
Not from anyone!
Why do you pretend to stay?
It makes me think you're gonna help me
But you're not
So why stay?
You're torturing me
That it!
That's all you want!
You wanna watch me suffer in this strange pain
A pain not seen
A pain always felt
I don't like being alone
But I feed off it
Can you help me?

No Idea

You think your life is broken
While I don't even know why I continue mine
You pretend that everything's ruined
While I'd be happy to know what's going on
You have no idea what a bad life is!
Sure you have to do everything
I know I don't
But the basics are different
You have every right to pout and shout
But you don't get hurt everyday
No one does anything to show you they hate you
They don't go after you just to give you a punch or two
But having people turn their backs, outta no where
That's something you must worry about
Once they leave you have no one
You just wanna run and leave your problems
The ones you don't have
I understand what you want
But, right now, I can't give you anything
Just to show that I haven't forgotten this one thing
Happy birthday
Thanks for taking everything with you..

Crimson Wish

Pouring out nonstop
Wishing to be free
Knowing this is the only way
Looking away from the gashes
Feeling no pain
The gashes have already been made
Nothing's worth this pain
Wanting out
Why must everyone hate?
Not understanding why
Setting the pain free
Wish for no more chances
A new home comes to view
Good-bye to all those liars and the pain

I Deserve To Be Miserable

Those were the words
They came out faster than I ever imaged
But those words spoke the truth
I do deserve to be miserable
I don't know why
But all those bad things I've done
They must be repaid
I deserve to be miserable
I know
But must those words be spoken?
Just to hurt me more?
Haven't I suffered enough?
Seems not
Those words still exist to haunt me
I'm sorry for everything I've done
I hope you can forgive me
I know how I can make you happy
I'll disappear and never come back
I promise
This is the way I'll repay my sins

Let Me

If i fell inside the earth
You wouldn't care
You have everything that belonged to me
Now I guess that I'm free
Everything doesn't really matter
But I don't care
I need to be here
I don't know why
Let me free
Let me die
Force away your crooked smile
The one you wear
You shot me up, standing there
Let me go
Leave the air
I need you just to know one thing
Let me go
Let me free
Then you'll see
I've forgiven you
Well I think I have
Now it's time for me to be free